This whole attitude adjustment I've been talking about has been a huge wake up call for me. Not only have I been living in a pity party, I also haven't been LIVING. The daily caring for four children, a cat, a house and a spouse has pushed my life into the background. Honestly, blogging has been the only thing I've done for myself in a long time. It gives me a chance to escape the duties of my life and focus on friends. Sure, I have to fit it in among dinner, dishes, laundry, changing diapers, escaping kids, bickering children, but I DO IT. I certainly can't say that about other facets of my life.
So, on Saturday I went to scrapbook with my friend Angie. It was so nice to have a few hours without my family to regroup and spend time with her (and all her customers too). Sadly, I had a snafu and LEFT MY PICTURES HERE and my loving husband kindly drove the 40 minutes to bring them to me (I felt so bad asking, but it turned out I had his wallet in my pocketbook!). I got Meg's baby album almost complete (mind you, she'll be 8 in January) and I worked a bit on Drew's baby album. I came home feeling refreshed.
Sunday I woke up less stressed and lighter than I have in a long time. Coming to the realization that I have to take time for me and enjoy it has been so good for me. The guilt is starting to wash away. I can't be a good wife or mother if I can't be good to myself. I'm sure that there will be days when things are dark and gloomy, but right now it feels so good to be coming out of the dark.